Article 108639 of rec.humor:
Newsgroups: rec.humor
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From: troll@nick.csh.rit.edu (Howard B. Kellick)
Subject: Borg Songs
Message-ID: [1993Oct17.223706.27659@ultb.isc.rit.edu]
Sender: news@ultb.isc.rit.edu (USENET News System)
Nntp-Posting-Host: nick.csh.rit.edu
Organization: Computer Science House @ RIT
References: [1993Oct17.214553.28668@seas.smu.edu]
Date: Sun, 17 Oct 1993 22:37:06 GMT
Lines: 203
Lately, I've been working on some takeoffs of songs.
I find them to be humorous so where else to post them but rec.humor
Enjoy!!!!!
Mail any comments to
troll@nick.csh.rit.edu
===================================================
Living in the Borg
-adapted by trollus of Borg(That's we!)
====================================================
There's something wrong in the universe today.
We know what it is.
"The Starship Enterprise"
We have seen them once or twice,
We know they're not yet ours.
We're what they would call "surprised"
Living in the Borg.
Living in the Borg.
Living in the Borg.
Living in the Borg.
There's something wrong in the universe today.
It's ugly, and has too much hair.
and it calls itself "Me"
If you can name the species,
by the colors of their skin,
then 2 of 6, you're a better Borg than We
Living in the Borg.
We will stop their futile stalling.
Living in the Borg.
We will stop them real soon.
Living in the Borg.
We will stop their futile stalling.
Living in the Borg.
Tell us, do you think they should be assimilated,
aggrivated then frustrated
They're getting to us.
If the Federation says the Borg are coming,
Even if they weren't, wouldn't they come crawlin'
back again?
I bet they would
("our friends")
again and again and again and again.
There's something wrong in the universe today.
And the Borg knows it's wrong.
But we can't do anything about it.
But we know they're just hanging on.
(clock ticks)
(Phaser fire)
(explosion)
Living in the Borg.
Living in the Borg.
Living in the Borg.
Living in the Borg.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Living in the Borg.
We will stop their futile stalling.
We will stop them real soon.
Living in the Borg.
We will stop their futile stalling.
Living in the Borg.
They will be one of us.
They will be one of us.
Living with the Borg.
We will stop their futile stalling.
We will stop them real soon.
Living in the Borg.
We will stop their futile stalling.
Living in the Borg.
==================================================
Two Borg ships
adapted by trollus of borg (that's We!!!!)
==================================================
One, Two, Borg ships lay before you.
(That's what we said, now)
Borg ships, Borg ships who deplore you.
(That's just too bad, now)
This one will assimilate your brain.
(You've got no chance, now)
This one will do just the same.
(We'll be enhanced, now)
That one, will make you dissolve.
(That's what we said now)
There's no problem that we can't solve.
(It's in our heads, now)
Get killed by them, no more stupid chatter.
(You're life's worth cents now)
Get killed by us, it doesn't really matter.
(There's no difference, now)
"Awwww, assimilate him then assimilate me.
Resistance is Futile, I now can see.
Ain't got no more future, no family-tree
But I know how a really bad Borg ought to be,
I know how a really bad Borg ought to be...
Auughhhh!!!"
Said if you want to make them one of us
(Just go ahead, now0
And if you want to fight and fuss
(Don't even try, now)
If you want to get the Enterprise
(Just go ahead now)
And if you want to see our demise.
(Don't even try,now)
==============================================================
Always look on the Borg side of life
-adapted by trollus of Borg (That's we!)
=============================================================
Most things in life are bad
They can really make you mad.
Other things just make you swear and cuss.
When you're chewing on Life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle,
and just be glad you're not yet one of us...
And...
...always look on the Borg side of Life...
(whistle)
Always look on the Borg side of Life...
(whistle)
If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten.
and that's to pray that we're not coming yet
If you think that you'll be saved.
The road to freedom is now paved.
All we say is "wanna make a bet"
And...always look on the Borg side of Life
(whistle)
Come On.
Always look on the Borg side of Life.
(whistle)
For life is quite absurd,
"Assimilation"'s the final word.
If we must, we'll go that extra mile...
Forget about the fight.
'cause the Borg are always right.
And We're sure you'll know resistance is futile.
So...Always look on the Borg side of death.
(whistle)
Just before you draw your terminal breath
(whistle)
Life's a piece of shit
when you look at it.
That's why we do what we do.
Just remeber that we're here.
We're not going anywhere,
and soon we'll be coming after you.
And...always look on the Borg side of life.
Always look on the Borg side of Life.
(whistle)
Cheering up is irrelevent
Always look on the Borg side of Life.
(whistle)
Always look on the Borg side of Life.
(whistle)
Worst things happen in space, you know.
Always look on the Borg side of Life.
(whistle)
We mean - what have you got to lose?
You came from nothing?
You're going back to nothing.
What have you lost? Nothing.
Always look on the Borg side of Life.
(whistle)
(fade)
--
how do you know she is a witch? BEWARE!!! Trolls are going to conquer
Well, she turned me into a newt? the world!
A newt?
(Pause) I got better. troll@nick.csh.rit.edu
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