Forwarded from: The Hejirah Society of America
The New Age Apostle's Creed of the year 10 (New Era) (A political manifesto for
the modern age)
I believe and will follow the following dictums with all my heart and soul:
1. I recognize two categories of people: A) Oppressors: all white, male
heterosexuals who are able-bodied and of sound mind, with some partial,
concessionary exceptions for white, able-bodied, sound-minded, male
heterosexuals of Marxist leanings or who show clear, visible and severe signs
of economic deprivation; and B) Victims: all those, human or otherwise, who do
not fit into category A, with the exclusion of unborn potential human victims.
2. If I am of category B, in order to promote a diverse and pluralistic
society, I will devote my life to expressing my indignation at being a victim
and to pressuring those of category A to confess their guilt.
If I am of category A, I will confess my guilt, grovel on the ground and be
constantly sensitive to those of category B, all of whom I have oppressed.
3. I will use inclusive language at all times, and I shall moan and express my
indignation at all the linguistic noninclusiveness and insensitivity that I
hear or read without regard of the age or culture in which a text has been
written.
4. I will be careful not to use any insensitive, ethnocentric or phallocentric
imagery or metaphors in my language that may offend the sensitivities of any
member of category B, such as the use of the generic 'he, black and white
imagery, male, patriarchal metaphors, female metaphors that are not suitable
for New Age ideals, or the use of ethnic terms such as 'American Indian',
'black', etc., which have been expired for more than 24 hours.
5. While maintaining the sensitivity and inclusiveness, which are described in
points three and four, I will construct my language, arguments and thoughts
entirely with euphemisms, buzzwords, cliches, emotive interjections, and
ejaculations of discontent that adhere to the thought guidelines of the
consensus of category B.
6. If I am a member of category B, I will not do or say anything that might
brand me a sexist, racist, homophobe, ablist, logocentrist or a category A
sympathizer (i.e. anything that two or more members of the consensus of
category B deem as thought crimes).
If I am a member of category A, I will confess my sexism, racism,
logocentrism, and homophobia and do penitence for these sins until I die or
change my sexual orientation.
7. If I should involuntarily think any thoughts that the consensus of category
B have not approved, I will not express them and I will look forward to the day
when the consensus acquires the technological ability to rescue me from the
evil thoughts that I am too weak to control.
8. I will be completely critical of the entire history of Western civilization
and all Judeo-Christian values, morals, and traditions, and replace them with
________________ (fill in anything that is a deviation from Old Era values that
fits the guidelines of this creed).
9. I will persecute, censor and shun any member of category A who fails to
comply with the benevolent dictates of this creed, if evidence - i.e. any
accusation by a member of category B - is presented against him, or any member
of category B who conspires with a member of category A in any manner that may
be perceived as insensitive, sexist, racist, ablist or homophobic.
10. I will submit all my thoughts, words and deeds to the scrutiny of the
consensus of category B, without questioning or qualification, and accept any
reprimands that I may warrant in the event that the consensus should find me
guilty of any infraction of the forgoing points of this creed - real or
imagined - of which I cannot prove my innocence.
SO HELP ME DEITY OF UNSPECIFIED GENDER THAT IS PROBABLY A FEMALE
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