1. For an aero, a good night's sleep is like a job: it's something we all
dream of getting, but few of us ever will.
2. When in doubt, just wing it.
3. Being a rocket scientist is a great way to launch a career.
4. Propulsion provides the main thrust of our efforts.
5. The only restriction on the length of the landing gear is that it should
hit the ground first.
6. Orbital mechanics is really just a lot of circular reasoning and
roundabout proofs.
7. Aeros are just plane crazy.
8. The departments of the AAE school:
--Advanced paper airplane design (structures)
--Archery (Arrow dynamics)
--Snowball trajectory analysis (dynamics & controls)
--Rubber band launching (propulsion)
9. The following courses will be added starting Jan 1992 to improve our
chances of finding a job:
--The aerodynamics of hamburger flipping
--Heat transfer in french fries
--Begging made easy
10. Boeing: the sound an aircraft part makes when it falls off a plane and
hits the ground
11. Frictional effects are a real drag.
12. "I have not yet completed grading your test on stress, strain, and
tension. So let's talk about failure" -- structures prof
13. For the most part, beam theory is shear terror, but it does have its
great moments.
14. The material toughness factor is KC.
15. We all love Gruesome Hall.
16. We love gn (gus's network) even more.
17. The space shuttle theory: if you put enough thrust behind it, anything
will fly.
18. The boosters for the space shuttle produce 3 million pounds of thrust
each and can barely lift their own paperwork into orbit.
19. Fatigue is a very tiring class.
20. We're really not all space cadets.
21. We love sharing a building with the I.E.s (Imaginary Engineers).
22. Sign posted:
"In case of emergency (I.E., fire, tornado, etc) ..."
23. Enjoy your hours of sleep each week. Both of them.
24. Many aeros tend to be flighty people.
25. We don't have our heads in the clouds -- most of us haven't been that
down to earth in a long time.
26. U.S. Navy philosophy on landing on an aircraft carrier:
Aim for the deck and hope for the best.
27. Addendum to pilots' preflight checklist on commercial airliners:
Please verify that the following items are securely attached
before takeoff:
A) Wings B) Engines C) Fuselage
28. The theory of modern U.S. fighter jets:
Nothing can kill the pilot except for the plane.
29. We can always drop out of aero and become paratroopers.
30. "Stability is only good if you aren't heading straight into the ground."
-- flight controls prof
31. Spacecraft controls majors often have attitude problems.
32. The orbital radius of the satellite should exceed the radius of the earth.
33. A belly flop is the most efficient way to stop an airplane on a short
runway
34. Too bad Physics 152 has nothing to do with reality. It would be great to
make our planes out of massless rods covered by frictionless surfaces.
35. Mechanical engineer: someone who wanted to be an aero but also wanted
to be employed.
36. It is an aeronautical fact that the bumblebee can't fly -- its wings
simply cannot generate sufficient lift. Apparently God just forgot to
tell that to the bumblebee.
37. How to fly:
1) Jump into the air and miss the ground.
or
2) Hurl yourself at the ground and miss (actually, this is a correct
summary of the theory behind orbital flight).
38. We all loved Physics 342 -- relatively speaking.
39. No one has ever been killed because a plane lost power -- all deaths in
planes have resulted from unsuccessful landings.
40. Logic is the right way to get the wrong answer and feel good about it.
41. "We shall neglect this term in the equation simply because we have no
idea how to deal with it." -- aerodynamics prof
42. NASA prelaunch bulletin on Endeavour's recovery of INTELSAT: "This
encounter will give us an opportunity to study the dynamics of handling
heavy objects in weightlessness."
43. You never get grades for landings -- all landings are strictly pass/fail.
Any landing you can walk away from is a 'pass'.
44. Enginere: Yesterday I couldn't spell one; now me are one.
45. Aero engineers historically do everything backwards. We even count
backwards
46. Aero engineer job search techniques:
Stand out on a street corner holding a sign reading, "Will build
spacecraft for food."
47. We enjoy our 340 homework to no end -- literally.
48. Save a tree -- drop AAE 340.
49. If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid.
50. Design must take into account three major factors:
1) The expected operating stresses and material fatigue
2) 'Murphy was an optimist' principle: unexpected events
3) Management stupidity
51. Regardless of what the numbers say, it's still amazing that planes fly.
Sent to me by: ozbrown@sage.cc.purdue.edu (Paul Raymond "OZZY" Brown)
Spell Checked and reformatted by Nathan Mates (nathan@cco.caltech.edu)
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